That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
