Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
