we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
