I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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