there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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