he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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