Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
