We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
