i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
