the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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