so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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