So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
