I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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