i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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