My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
handjob tips. give me some.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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