ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I just had sex on a roof
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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