i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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