He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
