Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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