Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
