My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
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