he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
