please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
