GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize