i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
