do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
The air was thick with penises
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
