Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
