You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
