it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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