Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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