I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize