HIV tests are more positive than that guy
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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