I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... ๐ฏ๐๐๐
Do I even want to know?
Randomize