you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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