we have officially lost it.
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
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