so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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