Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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