You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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