i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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