Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
