She's JV to your varsity
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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