The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize