I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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