my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
