take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
