Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
