He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
