Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Duck Duck Cougar?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
