i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
