I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize