Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
wow bdsm is so cute
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